My 2 Second Shelf Life

Reecie recently wrote about girlfriends and how hard it is to make new friends as you get older. I agree that it's harder to maintain friendships as your time becomes less and your responsibilities become more. For me, it's distance and time that causes the problem.
I often don't get to see the girlfriends I've known and loved for years because of these two factors.
Because of the evil twins: Distance and Time it makes me stingy and picky with possible new friends.

I now have criteria.

Years ago, every female I knew was my "friend". I've done much weeding since then. My tolerance for being taken advantage of, dealing with high maintenance women, or dragged into drama is almost non-existent now.

I have compiled a list of types of women that I abhor, and cannot endure:

Competelina
I once had a friend who brought out the worst in me. She was competitive and petty. I stayed friends with her for a long time because we had history. I had known her for a long time, but I had to cut her off. I don't have time for that kind of picayune nonsense.

Petty Patty
Everything bothers her. She's critical, and always negative. I once had a friend who couldn't stand it if anything good happened for me. I cut her off shortly after she met The Mister for the first time. We had all gone out and he was footing the bill for her drinks and food. When his pager went off and he went to make a phone call, she said, "Oh, I wouldn't like that at all. Anyone can be calling him and you wouldn't know. A man with a pager is suspect". Who needs someone like that around?
Exactly. That's why she isn't.

Possessorella
Can't share you with anyone. Is jealous of other friends and is always looking for ways to feel offended. Does not play well in group situations. I had a friend years ago who was jealous of The Mister. She accused me of putting him ahead of her.
I did.


Moochita
Always asking for things. When she borrows things, you have to ask for them back, and makes you feel as though you're the one who is being petty and cheap when you do.
Famous for the old "I forgot my bankcard" trick when you go out together, or is always borrowing small amounts of money, nickel and diming you and never paying back. When you're short, she'll be broke.

Hootchie
The chick you can't leave alone with your man.
She wants what you have. She's got some complex about being better, prettier, more desirable. She's got no loyalty or morals, and won't think twice about you if she wants it.


I've had all of these kinds of women "friends" in the past.
I've got a shorter tether, and no tolerance for dramatic events .
Not anymore.

Life is good.