My 2 Second Shelf Life

Legal, Bureaucratic Extortion

March 24th, 2009
On a rainy March night, I make a right turn on Victoria Park and St. Clair E on an amber.
Lightning strikes, and then I realize that it wasn't lightning, but the red light camera.

April 3rd, 2009
I receive a $180 ticket for making a right turn on an amber, which turned red when I was 1.9 seconds into the intersection. Considering I've been told on numerous occasions that I should get new plates because my number isn't clear enough. My license plate number is surprisingly clear in the photo.
I decide to fight said ticket, since had I attempted to stop, I probably would have lost control of my vehicle since the conditions were wet, and my tires suck.
I have until April 8th to set a court date in person. Contrary to what it says on my ticket, I cannot make an appointment by phone. Rather obvious, since the telephone number on the ticket is manned by automated prompts that repeat the same things, with no "person" option, and with a built in disconnect if you hit "0"...HAHAHAHAHAH!!! Oh, that's hilarious!

April 8th, 2009
I decide to go to the Markham Rd office on this day because I'm rarely in Scarborough, but I would be on that day.
I take a number in a room that has people packed into it like sardines. I'm T417, and they are currently serving T009. Only 3 wickets are open, and there are 4 categories of ticket numbers. I've been to offices in the west end. I've never seen shit like this before.
I'm there for an hour and a half and they are only at T089. I realize that I only paid for an hour and a half in the parking lot, and wouldn't it be sardonic if I got a ticket trying to get a court date to fight a ticket.
I then realize that there appears to be a method to this madness.
If you cram 800 people into a small room with only 100 chairs, and 3 wickets open, and it takes an hour and a half to service 80 people...anyone who can afford it will leave, and pay the ticket...because it's just not worth it.

It's license to print money.
It's fucking genius...I tell you.