Monday, April 10, 2006

Wag the Dog

Over the past 10 years or so, the one outweighing the many has become du rigeur.
If someone is allergic to nuts, no nuts allowed in the building.
If someone is allergic to bananas, no bananas allowed in the building.

Last month I had to go to a government office for something.
While I was in the reception area, I noticed that both entries to the offices were covered with warning signs:
"Nut Free Environment"
"Scent Free Environment"
"No Bananas beyond this point"
(I shit you not)
"Aerosol Free Environment" and a bunch of other stuff that I wouldn't even think to bring into an office...I guess that was for "just in case".

I realize that there are people who are suffering with allergies that are serious, and I'm probably going to sound like a Superior, Grade A, Top Sirloin Bitch when I say this, but gimme a break.
I say that if your life is unbearable in public, go on long term disability.
For the rest of us, it's worth it.
The workplace has enough to tolerate.

Is that insensitive?
Just as insensitive as expecting an entire work environment, perhaps consisting of hundreds of people to accommodate you.

I wear perfume.
I love perfume.
Scent is part of my whole feel good thing.
I love it when other people smell nice.
It's part of my whole feel good thing.

If you have to take me aside and tell me to stop wearing perfume, then you have to tell that woman whose skirt is too short for her age to dress appropriately (I find it offensive), and then you also have to take that guy whose hygiene is bad aside and tell him the merits of taking a bath daily (I find this disgusting and shouldn't have to put up with it). Tell that client that she needs breath mints (I shouldn't have to tolerate that). You also have to take that woman aside who smells of the dinner she cooked last night and tell her to lay off the heavy spices...and that other chick who put the fish in the microwave for lunch, tell her she can't do that anymore.

I know it seems a little intrusive, what I'm suggesting...but, fair is fair.