Wednesday, May 31, 2006

"The rudeness that hath appear’d in me have I learn’d from my entertainment. What I am, and what I would, are as secret as maidenhead; to your ears, divinity; to any other’s, profanation."



"When I ain't rappin' no more, I want to open up an ice cream parlor and call myself Scoop Dogg".



I got a great laugh from Stuff on My Cat.com...and I needed it today.

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Will You Still Need Me, When I'm 64...

On Sunday I saw a girl with a gigantic tattoo on her arm that said "shorty".
I wonder how that will look 30 years from now.

Reading "shorty" then, will be like reading "Groovy" or "Dig it" on a woman in her 60's now.

Why?

I don't get it.

Monday, May 29, 2006

The Better Way is to Drive.

Every time I consider public transportation as a possible option...and I was thinking about it again with all the talk about amalgamating transit systems.
It has crossed my mind again as a "maybe", once or twice a week.
Either way, every time I consider it, something like this happens.

Now, I'm not adverse to people wanting to better their pay, and work conditions legally. When their contract is up...but this illegal strike shit is just thuggery.
The partiality for these tactics are the reason that I'm not fond of unions anymore.

I listened to one maintenance worker this morning talking about being attacked on the job...I was like WTF? Wasn't your issue supposed to be hours and conditions of work?
Who's attacking you, dude?
Are there tunnel thugs lurking around corners waiting for maintenance workers?
I thought that was an Operator issue, and your union boss claims that this wildcat strike has nothing to do with the Operators of the vehicles... the union claiming that they were locked out is just ludicrous.

Lie, lie, union lie.

Last week that Kinnear character was broadcasting that his members were not going to challenge riders if they refused to pay...way to put your members in a dangerous position, and to adversely affect a transit system that is already having financial challenges with decreased ridership, and assholes who sneak onto or confront drivers over fares.

Good job Kinnear.
You're really endearing your members to the general public.
I don't even take the transit and I'm pissed about it.
Most of us can only wish to have your members job security, and pay.
I don't say that Operators aren't worth it, because you certainly couldn't pay me enough to operate a bus or streetcar in certain neighbourhoods of this city...but for the education requirement, they're paid pretty damn well.
Unfortunately, it comes with the possibility of harm, as any job dealing directly with the public does.

Cab Drivers, Pizza Delivery guys, Convenience Store Clerks....all at risk because they work closely with the public...none of which enjoy the benefits or pay rate of the TTC worker.

This is not the work of the members...this is the glut of their union.
Sometimes you just have to create issues to justify your existence.
But, if your going to do that Mr. Kinnear...get your lies straight.

Photo: via Strangebreed.ca

Sunday, May 28, 2006

"I said Welcome to Detroit City
Every place, everywhere we go
Man we deep everywhere we roll
Ask around and they all know Tricky
That's what's good man they all say Tricky"
~Eminem~

The Mister and me did a road trip to Windsor and Detroit.
Sorry, I couldn't find a song that had Windsor in it's lyrics except for that one cool song where Johnny Cash spits out every city in North America to music.

Anyhow, we almost didn't cross the border because The Mister didn't want to deal with the Customs Officers, and their home security questions.
But, then decided "oh what the hell"...
This time the Customs Officer didn't even lean forward. He seemed more interested in why we would drive such a long way for such a short time.
"You drove how far, to do what?"
And then The Mister launched into the whole "We do road trips. It's what we like to do" schtick. C.O. raised an eyebrow above his sunglasses twice while listening, and then waved us through without looking at the passports The Mister had at the ready, or asking for any I.D.

We parked and passed this cute old guy to the right playing a Hungarian sounding waltz.

We had lunch at the Tunnel BBQ, which is apparently one of the oldest restaurants in downtown Windsor.
There's a whole story about Helen and Harry Racovitis (to your left). He was Greek, she was Lebanese...it was love...and in 1942 they opened a restaurant steps away from the Detroit/Windsor border.



We drove by this couple who looked like they were trying to cross the street. I snapped the shot, and then The Mister said "Look!" and I saw in the rearview that they were standing in the middle of the road in a tango pose kiss. Did I get a picture of that?
...erhm...no.

And then The Mister agreed to stop into The Guardian Building. I originally saw shots of this building on dETROITFUNK, and finally had the opportunity to see the building in its splendor for myself.
It really is impressive.





Detroit has certainly cleaned up it's act since the last time we were there.
The old buildings downtown, many of which look like they were built at the turn of the century to the 1940's are beautiful, now that they've been cleaned up and restored.
Unlike Toronto, which just loves to destroy historical buildings and replace them with glass condo like structures, Detroit seems to be embracing it's former glory.
It's very nice.

No trouble getting back...the Detroit/Windsor border seemed somewhat more relaxed than Buffalo/Niagara..or maybe it was just all the Memorial Day festivities that had them in a convivial mood.

Back now.
Work tomorrow.
*sigh*

Friday, May 26, 2006

One Step Closer to Prince



I read that Prince was on American Idol last night!
Then I read:

"As previously reported, Prince has two Las Vegas shows lined up for tomorrow and Sunday (May 27 and May 28). Billed as an evening with Prince and special guest Tamar Davis, The Empire Ballroom in Las Vegas has temporarily re-named the intimate hall The 3121 Club (1,500 seats) in honor of the Minneapolis star."


here.

Next stop: CASINO-RAMA!!!!



When a grown man does his hair like an elementary schoolgirl, isn't he just begging you to fuck with him, so that he can kick the shit out of you?



Proof that Liberace might have been from Bosnia Herzegovina

Thursday, May 25, 2006

OPA!

The other day I wrote this entry on the Children's Dance Troupe "Kriva Reka".
I took Mama and Tetka Ljuba to their performance last night.

After practically having to arm wrestle Tetka Ljuba, I paid the admission for all three of us. But, I knew that Tetka Ljuba would find a way to sneak money to me. She's stealthy that way.
At the end of the performance, she disappeared into the crowd, and reappeared 15 minutes later with a DVD, and announced: "Ya! I buy yu van too....now I pay yu bek..hahahah".
She's brutal.
Mama wanted to take a walk before the performance and visit the Church, next to the Serbian Centre. Tetka Ljuba didn't want to go. She wanted to go into the kitchen and talk to her Church lady friends.
Mama was worried about the good seats they had nabbed.
"Lay down on da chairs eef yu hef to! Bah don geev dem to nooobady!"

Pity me, wedged between the two of them for 3.5 hours.

Through some fluke of misunderstanding, we were there early, and the show started late.
We were in the front row, and Mama was seated next to the Consul General, which was a big thrill.
There were quite a few Othodox Priests in attendance last night, and I couldn't help but find the sight of a Popa in his long flowing robes, beard and gigantic crucifix excusing himself, and fumbling around under his robe for his cell phone.

Forgive me, but I find the sight amusing.
I also thought about the number of times these Priests had to endure people coming up to them and kissing their hands.

Bleh.


Decidedly, if you're an Orthodox Priest you absolutely cannot be a germaphobe.
I hope they carry hand sanitizer under those robes too.

But, on a serious note, Rada Micic's intro was both touching and poetic.
With tears in her eyes, and cracking voice, she said that these children were a reminder to us as a community how lucky we are to be here, and who we left behind.
She pointed out that these are some of the forgotten children of Kosovo, Serbian children who deserve to have the sun shine on their shoulders as well.

How inspiring to see their faces. They were glowing.
The sheer joy was just radiating from them...they were flying.

How easy and simple it is to forget that through a stroke of fate, I'm lucky enough (hear that Oprah!?!) to be stressed out with my trivial day to day matters, but safe.
Living in a secure country, and not dodging KLA sniper bullets in a place that has lost the interest of the world.

Was this entry "preachy"?
Perhaps.
But, yesterday I was reminded of how lucky I really am.

Tuesday, May 23, 2006

'Children of war' dance

I read this article this morning on the efforts of Rade & Rada Micic in raising $30,000 in order to bring 20 Kosovo teenagers to Toronto to perform.

I met Rada Micic quite by accident, and she has been diligent about working for and with the Serbian community.
I get e-mails from her regularly letting me know what is being performed, for what causes.
She initially was involved with helping Serbian mothers searching for their lost sons after and during the Balkan wars, and I guess one thing leads to another, and she and her husband have been working to bring these underprivileged children to see another world.

These teenagers... who have lived their entire lives in disaster, and war...to let them see that there is a whole world out there. That it's not hopeless...

I'm so happy to see The Toronto Star reporting on something positive to do with the Serbian community for a change.

As for Rade & Rada Micic...congratulations and thank you for being wonderful human beings.

Just try telling a kid "no" nowadays and see what happens.

6 little hooligans arrested, and I hope they get more than just a young offender slap.
But, it's highly unlikely.

Monday, May 22, 2006

My Love Affair with Indian Movies...

I love Deepa Mehta's movies.
I don't think that she can ever be called a Bollywood movie maker.

From Sam and Me, the first movie of hers I ever saw, to Bollywood Hollywood, to Water.
I love her intensity, her fearlessness, her anger, and her humour.

Today, I watched Fire and took some photos while I was watching. Because if Deepa's movies are anything, they're lovely to watch.

I've posted the rest of them to Look Up Radmila.

Not that they're anything special, but they've inspired me to do something I haven't done in many years.
Pick up a brush.
Wish me luck.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

It's the Little Things...

The Mister parked in front of a convenience store for me to quickly run in for something.
When he pulled up in front, there were two five or six year old, skinny, knobby knee'd boys standing in front.
One had a long tube of gumballs, some of which he was chewing, while holding the tube away from what looked like his younger brother.
His little brothers arms were folded and he looked upset.

When I got out of the car, I said to the gum withholder, "You're not sharing with him? I'm sure that he'd share with you.." and went into the store.
While in there, I could see through the front door, that the gum dispute was still raging. On a whim, I bought a big sucker...you know, the kind with the gum in the center...and on my way out the door gave it to the gum deprived kid.
"Ok, now?" I asked.
First he looked at me suspiciously, then I guess the light went on realizing that I had just bought it from the store, he took it and smiled.
"Thank you" he shouted as I got into the car.

As we drove away, I could see him waving the sucker in his brothers face and dancing.
"He's happy now..." says The Mister.

Sunday Click Around

3D Artist has some really interesting 3D art. Computer images that are really interesting to look at.
Carnival of the Photographers...
Miles Aldridge is a photographer. The website is a little irritating to navigate, but the photographs are worth looking at.
Urchin Rock is a collection of the work of underwater photographers. There's something about the way the body looks underwater that makes the images somewhat surreal.
Erwin Olaf a photgrapher from the Netherlands has images that are dark and a little bizarre, but very compelling. Rachel Papo is a photgrapher who has a whole series on female Isreali soldiers. There's something about women in that role that is fascinating to me.

Moving away from Photographers, Nicole Farzone does some of her art on an Etch-a-sketch which is pretty impressive to me... since I could never even get a circle made with the little knobs. Do they still sell them? If they don't, they should be revived.
Eh, maybe not...it's not immediate enough to entertain todays children.

On Asia Recipes.com, I found this page about herbs and old wives tales. I find this stuff fascinating. Especially since I've got an aunt who still heavily believes in them.

I get a lot of hits from people looking for stuff on Serbian weddings, and Serbian love phrases..I'm so sorry to disappoint those Googlers. But, on occasion I follow a search back and find something interesting. On one such follow, I found this little story on Migration Heritage Centre focusing on Ruza & Bozidor and their recollections of a traditional Serbian wedding back in 1956.
The Metrosexual Tarot Card Set is friggen hilarious. I'm not particularly fond of the Metrosexual trend. While I like men groomed, I don't like them hyper-groomed over the line to female.

This is true is a site dedicated to unbelievable true stories. I burned a long time reading how ridiculous people are.
Truth is stranger than fiction.

Massive Corporation is a good laugh. If you've ever worked in a corporate environment, you'll find this site amusing.

Lileks has a whole section on Postcards from Motels. Remember when every motel had free picture postcards in their rooms? Someone is collecting them, and they're great. I've written about the disappearance of the motels from the 1950's and 1960's. It's nice to know that someone is collecting old pictures of that unique architecture.

And, last but not least...in honour of the DaVinci hype...20 things you didn't know about Leonardo DaVinci.

See you later...

Friday, May 19, 2006

Perilous Pedestrians & Dumb Drivers

Yesterday, I was making a left turn on an amber light.
Suddenly, a pedestrian casually starts to cross the road at the last minute.
I saw her, but she didn't see me.
When she did, I was stopped, and my grill was in line with her hip. She looked like she was going to have a stroke. She made a little jump, and started running across the street.

I laughed.

Out loud, and she saw me, and shot me a dirty look.
But, I shouldn't have to be the only one paying attention to whats going on around me.
What's even more humourous... while I'm blogging about how stupid she is, for just casually sauntering out on an amber light, like she's going for a park stroll. Confident in her right of way, without so much as a mild concern for her own personal safety.
I'm sure that over her dinner table last night, a story was told of how a fucking crazy bitch in a Saturn tried to run her over.

So, off I went on my merry way...

Have you ever been driving and looked in your rearview to see someone gaining on you with excessive speed?
Someone bringing up the rear at such a speed, that you're afraid they won't be able to slow down or change lanes in time?
I had this asshole in a Z24 with apparently no muffler do this to me last evening.
He passed me (thank God), and I tried to look at him as he was passing.
I couldn't since his baseball cap was over his eyes and his seat was so far back that he looked like he was lying down. It was a wonder that he could see over the dash.
But, he looked cool.
Anyhow, my main objective at this point was to get away from him...because I thought: "This guy's an accident just waiting to happen".
I changed lanes (guys like him prefer the two far left lanes to dart in and out of), and kept driving.
About ten minutes or so later, traffic grinds to a halt.
It takes about twenty minutes to get to the problem.
Guess whose front end is jammed up a Honda's ass?

He wasn't looking so cool then...in fact he looked like the scared 19 year old he is.

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Carnival of the Chavs

I think that every culture has a word for money with no class.
I like the term "Chav".
The New York Times describe this British term like so:

"Chavs, whether rich or poor, tend to favor gaudy jewelry and expensive-but-tacky clothes with big logos and to behave in a way that others find coarse or obnoxious.

Male chavs wear tracksuits and baseball caps; female chavs pull their hair tightly back in buns or ponytails, a style known as a "council house facelift," from the term for public housing."


I think that we see a lot of celebrity chav behaviour.
I mean, let's face it...many people who become lucky enough to strike it rich, either by the lottery of life, or by lottery ticket blow the money out their asses rather recklessly.
Take 50 Cent and his chrome Lamborghini Murcielago, or Kimora Lee Simmons $3,000 a bottle Cristal foot bath.


Diddy's ridiculously pretentious parties, with strictly enforced themes and Diddy seated on a throne wearing a crown, lookin' like the Burger King.
Lindsey Lohan, and her midnight demands for scratch lottery tickets and spending sprees, to arrogant celebs demanding that shops open for them at a moments notice, clearing restaurants for themselves, and demanding that no servant like entity make eye contact with them.

In this article "How Celebrities Go Bankrupt", Legalzoom.com:

"One Hollywood financial advisor, Scott Feinstein, told the New York Times about a call he received from a client in his mid-twenties who wanted to buy a $35,000 watch. "I said ‘What time does it say?' and he said, ‘Ten minutes after 3.'" Feinstein recalled. "I told him, ‘Mine says 10 after 3 too, and it cost me 60 bucks. Put the watch down.'""


Sometimes money makes people stupidy.
And people who come into money through luck and a bit of talent are sometimes the stupidest.

I mean why waste that money on a reading program in your old neighbourhood, or build a community centre, or feed the homeless...why bother with that shit when you can pimp your Es-ca-lade with Lamborghini doors?
Why fund a seniors residence or orphanage when you can build canals in your house for a party, or wipe your ass with Egyptian cotton?

They're not socially responsible for anything.
Right?
That's right. They're not...but burning cash like that is an insult to all of us.

I mean, priorities are priorities and it's a persons prerogative if they want to blow money out their ass until they're broke and out of the limelight.
When Celebrity Chav is paid out and played out, and their"entourages" and "crews" abandon them for someone who can afford to have them follow them around telling them that they're marvelous...
Then Celebrity Chav can join one of those hasbeen bands and tour no name lounges in Lefttesticle, Alberta, or do bit parts in sitcoms and bad series shows, like Surreal Life, or Celebrity Survivor.
Trying to make their comeback, ala Bobby Brown.

Then it'll be too late baby.
You're back to being the other kind of chav.

Saturday, May 13, 2006

Conversation with My Sister-in-Law

I called my sister in law Karen the other day, and it went like this:

S-i-L: "Hello?"
Me: "Hey"
S-i-L: (in a formal tone) "Can I call you back?"
Me: "Are you in a meeting?"
S-i-L: (in a formal tone) "I'll call you back"
Me: "Are you wearing panties?"

(Dial tone)

Twenty minutes later..
Me: "Hello?"
S-i-L: (laughing) "You fuckin' bitch...you just wait..."

Thursday, May 11, 2006

Bullying the Bully.

I read this article about a Christchurch, NZ father who scared the shit out of a kid who was torturing his daughter daily at school.

"Falcon was convicted on Tuesday of assault after the attack outside Mairehau Primary School before classes on March 30 in which he grabbed the 11-year-old boy around the neck and poked him in the face".

I'm split on this...I mean, it's wrong that he roughed the little brat up, but...that kid probably knows his rights too.
I equate it to the delinquent at school knowing that they can shove their teacher, or tell them to "fuck off", but if their teacher responds in kind, they can at worst be arrested for assault, at best be suspended or fired from their job.

I can't help but have compassion for the parent in this situation.

There have always been bullies in the schoolyard, but never has it reached the epic proportions that it is now.
Part of that (in my opinion)has to do with government interference in the rights of parents to discipline their children, and the interference of parents in the discipline of students at school.

I can't tell you how many times I've heard the parent of a bully justify their childs actions as being provoked. The logic of "well, if (accuser) hadn't have (fill in the blank), my son/daughter wouldn't have had to behave the way he/she did". No one wants to believe that their little cherub does terrible things to others, and even if we know it, it's a bitter pill to swallow when someone else tells you that they know it too.
Like my grandfather used to say: "You're ours, even if you have shit all over you". It's ok if I say that my kid is a little shit, but don't you dare say it...I'll cut you.

It's a sad corner that this last generation of parents has painted themselves into.
I look at the 12 to 17 year olds that hang in the yard of the school I leave every day, and some of them scare me.
Some of them look like seasoned thugs just looking for a reason to swarm.

By the time we lament about the disrespectful high schooler or junior elementary punk, we'll have a whole generation of people whose language is aggression.

In the words of Elton John:
"It’s sad,
so sad
It’s a sad, sad situation.
And it’s getting more and more absurd".

2 Unimportant Things:

Is it mandatory that over the age of 70, you must straddle a lane for two blocks before you actually change lanes? Because I'm noticing this more and more lately.
The elderly seem to need at least a kilometre of "getting ready" time...kind of like double dutch...





and what is it about this guy that makes me cringe everytime I see him?
I hear that he's charismatic and personable, but when I see him, and hear him speak, I wince at the smug Prep School looking package.

What is it?

It's irrational, and not based on anything solid...and really, while we're on the topic...when are we going to get a Mayor that reflects the majority of people in this city?

Sunday, May 07, 2006

Sunday Click Around

What a Beautiful World is a bunch of pictures of beautiful things.
Ever stumped about what to get the witch in your life? Witchy World has reasonably priced gift baskets.

Nevashut is a hilarious little game where your compliments can go far.

Mail a bullet can help you with your frustrations.
Send a bullet and a message to someone you hate. But you have to be up front about it. Unlike that voodoo doll site that used to be around, it won't allow anonymous messages (excellent).

Unusual album cover art is an interesting site. Scrolling down, I saw album covers that would never in a million years be acceptable today (thank goodness).

Handspeak is an interesting site on American Sign Language. I find sign language both fascinating and beautiful. When I see people signing, I have to stop myself from staring, because I know that it's rude...but I find the combination of hand movements, and facial expression captivating.

I burned a lot of time on Tricks of the Trade.
People submit shortcuts and wisdom from experience and trade. There are some great little tips on that site.

Know someone with a monobrow? Here's a site dedicated to the monobrow in the spirit of Mullets Galore. Good for a laugh or two, or three.

Last week, Cynical-C posted the link to The Saddest Thing I Own. I've found it as compelling as Post Secret in it's heart breaking stories accompanied by pictures.
I am now officially addicted to it.

Here's a little memory challenge. I did pretty well with it.
How about you?

Saturday, May 06, 2006

Let's Get Ready to Rumble!

I hate sports.
Really.
I'm a chicky chick when it comes to sports...
...but I loves me some boxing.

The Mister just shakes his head in confusion.
I love boxing for a bunch of reasons, and it isn't all about the actual fight.

Here's the list of some of things I love:

  • ~The whole spectacle of it. In reality, someone could die, or get seriously hurt.
  • ~The payout is called a "purse"
  • ~The corner trashtalk. I LOVE this, when it's in English. I love how the mooks in both corners will tell their guy that his opponent is a "fuckin' loozaa" or "you're killinim' ". This is especially effective when both eyes of their charge are swollen shut.
  • ~Characters like Macho Camacho or Prince Naseem Hamed. You have to admire guys who can fight in getups more complicated than a drag queens evening gown.
  • ~Sometimes the referee gives a wink and a sexy look before he starts the fight.
  • ~There is always the possibility of a riot breaking out in the ring.
  • ~I revel in Lennox Lewis getting his ass kicked.
  • ~The post fight interviews. No. Seriously. Sometimes it's like listening to Oswald Bates (Damon Wayans eloquent prison inmate whose vocabulary was full of incorrectly used clinical terms on In Living Colour)
  • ~Larry Merchant always sounds like he's toasted before they get to the main event, and trashed by the time he does the post fight interview in the ring.
  • ~When Mills Lane was still around: "LET'S GET IT OWWWWN!" (I miss Mills Lane).
  • ~One name: Mike Tyson. Laugh? I thought I'd die, everytime he was interviewed.
  • ~Buff bods. Need I say more?


That's all for now kids...

Thursday, May 04, 2006

Eastern European Fashion

It's exciting coming to "America", and having your choice of anything you want to wear. All the things that were for export, are here...and you don't know what to put on first...so, why not put everything on?
The 1980's bomber jacket, ala Saved by the Bell.
The hot pants...and because certain things just can't be left behind...your Hungarian waitress boots!
(Don't forget your nude pantyhose...)

Top that off with a brassy blonde dye job, and VOILA! everyone will be convinced that you're landed.

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Complaints

The Mister has always marvelled at the comfort level complete strangers have in telling me their personal problems and complaints.
Sometimes I marvel too.
People in line at the grocery store, the bank or any other place where you're forced to wait with people you don't know, will tell me things, I really have no business knowing.

This morning, I took my car in for semi-annual servicing.
When I went up to the cashier to pay my bill, she casually mentioned to "watch" something that I had mentioned to the service people, and to bring my car back if I notice it again.

She then called over my head and waved mail to some employee that was going into an office.
She then rolled her eyes and shook her head and said "I HATE THAT!".
"What? The fact that she ignored you" said I, with a chuckle..."Yeah! See her? She's going to get a gas chit. I ran errands all last week and did I get a gas chit? No. I. Did. Not."
She went on to complain about the number of hours that she's worked and not been paid for, and how some people get treated "special" while others break their backs for nothing in return. How that b-i-t-c-h gets away with murder, and God only knows why....I mean look at her...she can't even cover those roots. I don't see what the big deal is about her.

She was my instant best friend...until her Boss came around the corner.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Dose of Dorothy

The Red Dress

I always saw, I always said
If I were grown and free,
I'd have a gown of reddest red
As fine as you could see,

To wear out walking, sleek and slow,
Upon a Summer day,
And there'd be one to see me so
And flip the world away.

And he would be a gallant one,
With stars behind his eyes,
And hair like metal in the sun,
And lips too warm for lies.

I always saw us, gay and good,
High honored in the town.
Now I am grown to womanhood....
I have the silly gown.

~Dorothy Parker~

Monday, May 01, 2006

MARSHMELLOWS FOR EVERYONE!!!


In the spirit of Candygenius, I'm posting the recipe for Homemade Marshmellows, that I got here.
Ingredients:

Powdered sugar
3 1/2 envelopes (2 tablespoons plus 2 1/2 teaspoons) unflavored gelatin
1/2 cup cold water
2 cups sugar
1/2 cup light corn syrup
1/2 cup hot water
1/4 teaspoon salt
3 egg whites, room temperature
2 teaspoons vanilla extract


Line the bottom and sides of a 13- by 9-inch baking pan with plastic wrap; oil and then generously dust bottom and sides with some powdered sugar (I added coconut to the bottom as well).


In large bowl of an electric mixer, sprinkle gelatin over the 1/2 cup cold water; let stand to soften.
In a large, heavy saucepan, cook sugar, corn syrup, hot water, and salt over low heat, stirring until sugar is dissolved. Increase heat to medium-high and boil mixture approximately 4 to 5 minutes, without stirring, until a candy or digital thermometer registers 240°F or syrup reaches the firm-ball stage (when a small amount of syrup is dropped into very cold water, it forms a ball that holds its shape when pressed); immediately remove from heat.

Pour hot sugar mixture over gelatin mixture, stirring until gelatin is dissolved. Beat mixture on high speed approximately 5 to 6 minutes or until white, thick, and nearly tripled in volume.

In another large bowl with clean beaters, beat whites until they just hold stiff peaks; beat egg whites and vanilla into sugar mixture until well combined. Pour mixture into prepared baking pan; sift 1/4 cup powdered sugar evenly over top. Refrigerate marshmallow, uncovered, until firm (at least 3 hours).

Run a thin knife around edges of pan and invert pan onto a large cutting board; remove plastic wrap. Sprinkle top with 1/4 cup powdered sugar. With a large knife, trim edges of marshmallow and cut marshmallow into roughly 1-inch cubes. NOTE: To cut into even 1-inch squares, use and ruler and toothpicks to mark it every 1 inch. Lightly grease the blade of your knife with vegetable shortening. Cutting down firmly with the full length of the blade, cut the marshmallow into 1-inch strips. Sift additional powdered sugar over the tops if necessary.

Store either, covered with plastic wrap, in the refrigerator, or in an airtight container.

NOTE: For a delicious treat, coat marshmallow squares with melted chocolate.

No. But for real. I'm not a sweets lover, but this is a FANTASTIC dessert, with lots of potential. White chocolate, dark chocolate with coconut, substituting vanilla for a liquor..Grand Marnier or Bailey's for example.
I'll be making this again. It's only 12 hours after I made them, and there isn't one left in the house.

yum.