My 2 Second Shelf Life

Bats in the Belfry

The Mister was out on the driveway shovelling snow when he heard, "Radmila's husband!!! RADMILA'S HUSBAND!!!".

It was our neighbour two houses down, shouting from her second floor window. "Come!!! COOOOME!" she screamed, wildly gesticulating with her hands for him to come.

Now, The Mister got scared...he thought something terrible had happened, that someone was sick, or having a heart attack, or something.

When he got to the house, the door was unlocked and it was dark...she had barricaded herself and her children in a second floor bedroom.
He fumbled around in the dark, since he's never been inside their house..and couldn't find a light switch. He shouted to ask what was wrong, and she yelled back that there was a bird in the house.

Bird? At night? In February?
Then, it came at him...it was his turn to scream!
It wasn't a bird...it was a BAT!

The Mister has hunted iguana, and lizards...had a pet monkey back in Guyana as a boy, captured and kept Marabunta and giant cockroaches the size of small rodents, seen bats "back home"...but wasn't expecting one to attack him on the second floor landing of a Canadian house.
He knocked it down with his hand, and then grabbed a nearby exacto knife (they've been renovating their house for the past year) and killed it.

I'm married to Batslayer!
My hero!

The end.